I’ve been out of the loop lately and I apologize for that. Normally, I write every day, sometimes more than once a day. My health has prevented me from doing so recently but this morning, I feel a little better. Just a little bit, but I miss writing. I miss the connection that writing gives me.
Writing is sort of like breathing to me. I think of things I want to share and I start to type. I often don’t know where I will end up when I begin, but writing soothes my soul. It restores my place in this world.
I should be sleeping right now, but I can’t find any comfortable spot, and I miss affording my fingers the joy of tapping across the keyboard as they are used to doing when I can’t sleep. The house is quiet and peaceful at this hour. The sun is just trying to keep out from the east to greet this new day.
I haven’t been able to see too much joy these last few days. I seem to be stuck in a dark place. You see, it’s not that I don’t see the joy at all, it’s that I keep dwelling on the negative bits. It is all caused by my current health which is getting better, but not fast enough for me. This morning, for the first time, I see and feel some of that negativity finally lifting. I’m just so exceedingly tired of being sick. If it hadn’t been for a complication after surgery, I would be just about back to normal now. But that’s not how it happened.
I had my major surgery June 3. I was doing well until I ended up back in hospital with peritonitis, a dangerous abdominal infection, and a drain placement to my belly. The drain hurts more than the original surgery due to where they had to place it, in between my ribs and through cartilage, so it feels like broken ribs. The pain has been excruciating to say the least.
I will have the drain checked today. U had to have the tubing replaced on it already because it clogged. It has seemed as if nothing can go right with this surgery. I call myself the problem child. I monitor everything I do from what and when meds are taken to drain amount to how much yogurt I eat, because I also had a wickedly awful thrush in my mouth from one of the powerful antibiotics I’ve been on.
So, now you will understand where I’ve been. You see I’ve been unable to write very much and writing is my passion. This is the place that I can be myself and express myself as I am and how I feel. So Thank you to all of you that just happen to read this as well as those of you who look for my posts! I appreciate all of you. Hopefully, I’m on the mend now and can begin to write again more frequently. As for now, I’ll rest and attempt to continue my recuperate.
Love, Deirdre xx