The Darkness Lingers

The darkness lingers still .

I write and I am chastised.

I speak my mind

I am chastised for what I say.

I don’t understand yet I understand parts of it.

I can’t understand it all yet I want to with all my heart.

I ponder about that a very long time.

This is hard, so hard.

My heart breaks, my mind yearns for answers

my soul searches for peace.

What happened to the simple times?

I just want to love and to be loved.

I just want to understand,

but I will forever be in the darkness.

Light of My Heart

Another poem I wrote that I am fond of was written for Hubs.  He truly is my better half.  He is the one that comforts me when I need comforting, which has been a lot over the last 6 months.  He knows just the right words to use to get through to me.  He is the love of my life.  I couldn’t just go through this life without him by my side.

We were high school sweethearts and friends before that even.  I’ve known him since I was 10.  I dumped him.  Yes, I know.  I was going through a phase in life when I was young and didn’t understand myself all that well.  I actually fell madly in love with someone else and got married.  I remained in love with my husband for a very long time, but we both changed over time and eventually divorced.  Guess who never married! Yep, that would be Hubs.  This summer we will celebrate our 10th anniversary.  I have never been happier to have him in my life.

We have both grown in our relationship.  He and I still work on communication with each other.  I’m a communicator while he is not.  It’s just our personality type. I’m very open about everything.  He is very private.  When they say opposites attract, it’s true to an extent.  Hubs and I are different in many ways, but very much alike in others.  The choice we make everyday is to accept each other as we are.

I hope you enjoy reading my poem for Hubs.  He is the most wonderful man I know.  If you’d like to read my poem, and I do hope you do, please visit my poetry blog at My Blog Of Life.  There you will find all my poetry.  Thanks in advance for visiting.  Oh, and if you’re worried water is cheap.  What is there iare all original poems and I promise, they’re short!

Letter to 18 Year Old Me

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My mom and me on my 18th birthday

You think you are so smart in that outfit.

Let me tell you something little girl.

Buckle down, work hard, keep strong.

Don’t lose site of this relationship.

He is the right one and he does love you more than you know.

You are screwing up and you think you’re right so listen to your mom,

she’s right, as usual.

You can’t eat everything.  You will be fat and you will be miserable.

I know you can’t imagine that now, but if you don’t watch it,

it’s going to happen when you leave home and it’s going to be bad.

As for your mom? Be kind to her.  She is your best friend and you can’t even see it.

She isn’t going to be around forever.  You are going to miss her so much.

You will be lost without her when she’s gone. Take time to be close now.

Family is everything. I mean everything.  Don’t lose sight of that.

They are really the only ones who will always be there for you.

Always.

And remember that you are precious.  You are God’s child.  He doesn’t make mistakes.

He loves you always.

Never forget just how loved you truly are.

You will make a great nurse someday.  Just stay the course, little girl.

Stop being so stubborn and thinking you know everything.

You don’t know one damn thing about the world.  You’re still a child,

but that’s okay.  You’re just learning.  You’re getting your wings on.

You will learn, just don’t learn things too fast.

Stay the course, remember the love and be kind.  Okay? Just do it.

Now get on with your life.  There’s so much out there. Be careful.

Precious and Few

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Often we don’t notice how quickly life passes by. I’ve learned to take notice of the little things and appreciate the small things in my life. Here is a poem written about those precious little things in life. Enjoy! DAILY PROMPT
Precious

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/precious/

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Precious and few are the things we hold dear.
Children laughing and playing.
Birds sweetly chirping their morning calls.
Father’s stories of long ago.
Mother’s photos, her shoes, her purse.

Precious are the memories we share with those we love.
First kiss, first love, prom.
Wedding day, a vision of loveliness.
The birth of babies, first days, months, years.
Each day lasts forever, but years last only moments.

Our precious times are few of not shared with each other.
Memories last longer if shared.
Those memories become our histories and will be all that’s left when we leave this world.
Precious is our family. Precious are our true friends.
They will keep our treasured memories safe.
Together, we will create our precious histories.

Incomplete

I am one. Just one.

I am alone. I feel cold without the warmth of his skin next to mine.

I am tired. My eyes strained, dried out from the tears. I am somber at best. He is gone. Taken too soon from my world. From this life.

I am numb. So numb that pain can not reach me now. Tears stream. The only comfort that would soothe me is his touch. That which I long for I will never feel again.

I am empty. We had plans he and I. Why did he have to go now? Why? The question I keep asking. Why?

I am incomplete. Without him I am lost. I am just one now, no longer a couple. I am a widow who will wear black. I feel nothing but exhaustion. How do I go on without you? I’m too young for this. You shouldn’t have been taken like this. Not now. I’m not ready. I’ll never be ready. I shall remain incomplete.

widow and sunset

Glasses- day 2 prompt

Opening both eyes, she sees for the first time clearly. The glasses on her face. She is 3.

She noticed features of faces that are no longer blobs but have true features. Eyes, nose, mouth, teeth. They state back at her smiling face.

She looks around. She sees trees outside. She sees individual leaves all over the. Wow! She never knew!

She sees blades of grass. Blades, not just a sea of green! Flowers have petals! No more blobs! So much to take in! This new world of tiny images!

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Write a poem in the persona of a person who is the first to do something. For example, the first person to build a boat; to start a fire; to brew coffee; to walk on the moon; to look into a microsc…

Source: Day Two Prompt

Love Letter

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A handwritten love letter sealed with a kiss.

Each letter carefully crafted with a pen chosen for it’s weight and feel in the hand.

The paper, just the right thickness and color, handmade and sky blue.

Each word chosen so carefully to express my devotion and undying love to you.

A letter written any other way would never, could never express love the way my handwritten love letter will. I love you. I love you. I love you.

Long Trip Home

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With the van stuffed to capacity, we finally began our long, arduous journey home yesterday afternoon.  Knowing you have 18 hours ahead of you on the road is never fun, especially with 3 teenagers and an 8 year old, but being prepared makes the world of difference.

The van was overstuffed with snacks, and I do mean overstuffed! Looking for any kind of snack food in particular? We were prepared. We even had the largest single rice krispie treat I’ve ever laid my baby blues on! If one person are the entire thing, they eat approximately 3600 calories! So, from that to wheat things to bananas, we were covered. My daughter even named the load of honey wheat bread, Greg, for no reason other than she could! We were prepared for a zombie apocalypse.

My hubby flew down the day before so he could drive us home since I was now on pain meds and loopy as heck! He is my hero! Nothing better than being stoned on Dilaudid and unable to drive )  husband drive. What a guy!

We stopped for one Cracker Barrel meal and several potty pit stops. We played Mad Libs, we chatted we slept. Jim drove on. He finally needed a break break after driving 14 hours so my daughter drove for a little while. Then my dear husband was back at it again and got us home.

All I had to to was sleep. Do you have any idea how difficult that is for me to do in a car, especially when it’s my van filled with the people I love and I’m not in control of driving? Thank you Dilaudid! Without pain meds, I would not only have terrible pain, I would also be fretting over everyone else’s driving! I am a superior driver in my own mind, don’t you know! I actually trust my husband implicitly but only him. It’s very hard for me to give up that control.

Did I tell you all of what happened on vacation? Of course not! Well, it’s Murphy’s law and Murphy and I are thick as thieves these days!

I was in the ER out second day there. Our van was hit in a parking lot and left without a note. Yes, there’s damage. The kids overflowed the Jacuzzi tub with mass quantities of bubbles, yes bubbles, more than once. My husband, in his tired state, locked the keys in the van while trying to fix taillights that were broken by the hit and run in the parking lot. And the topper-offer I left my full coffee cup on the counter of the condo and realized it 150 miles away! That was the Murphy’s law version of our week’s holiday to Florida!

The remainder was fun in the sun, sun burns, laughs, Harry Potter marathon, great food, swimming in the pool, alligator spotting, the ocean and more great times!

We take the good with the bad and the good always outweighs the bad. We remember all of the great moments. Holidays are bonding times a92nd this one was a great one. It just could have been longer! But I will say, oooh, my bed feels good!

Colour My World

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Within me lives a brilliantly, white and yellow orb. It surfaces when I’m exuberant and joyful.

Within me lives a dark, cobalt blue and gray orb. It surfaces only when tears stream down my cheeks.

Many orbs live within my heart, they are rosy pink, like the colour of love, deepest black, like the colour of the darkest night, and an olive, sickly green, the colour of jealousy.

All the colours are within me each day. As my mood changes, the colours arise and show themselves to the world. I am a rainbow. A perfectly human rainbow.