Agree to Disagree

Whatever happened to freedom of speech? Why is it that some people get so upset when they disagree with something someone posts on social media? Well, my friends, I’m sick of all the craziness. Why can’t we all just get along and agree to disagree? 

Recently, I did something I never do. I posted something on Facebook that was political. It was something that made me angry. A friend of mine commented and asked me to take it down. I have no idea what happened, but later, I looked and it was gone. What the heck? Indidnt remove it but someone must have complained about it. Regardless, it wasn’t even that bad. I don’t say anything that I wouldn’t say normally in normal company and this had to do with my profession. If it was not a true statement by said candidate then my apologies, but I’m still not impressed by that particular candidate. 

The thing is what makes it alright for everyone else to voice their opinions but not me? Why can’t we just be civil and disagree like adults? If I were saying something negative against the opposite candidate I known for a fact my comment would have been left alone. Again, what the heck? I’m more than a little annoyed by all this but not surprised. I’m simply asking my friends to respect my rights as an American citizen to voice my opinion and leave it alone. Enough said on that subject.

What has become of our nation? It was once perfectly alright to voice your opinion no matter which side of the political fence you were on. Now it seems that unless you are on the correct side of that fence you will offend someone and they will no longer value you in the same way they once did. What a sad state of affairs we have. That being said, I’m really not that enthused by either of the candidates this year but I will vote and let my voice be heard in the ballot box. Not here or on social media ever again. To all my “friends”, my opinion matters just as much as yours does even if I do happen to disagree with you on this one matter. Please let me have my right to share my opinions just as I let you have yours without complaint or comment. Just keep on scrolling if you don’t agree and keep it happy out there.

A Better Life

What a beautiful morning to be alive. No, the weather isn’t perfecr, although the temperature is lovely. The sky is somewhat overcast, but I began my day early this morning As I seem to do more often As I get older. 

 As I sit here drinking my cup of coffee, I marvel in the small gifts we’ve been given in this life. So many gifts. Even those with much less than me have something to be grateful for and that makes me smile. Just the thought that the less fortunate can be so grateful for what they have in this life. Yet there are so many with more than I have who are always wanting and expecting more. They are never satisfied with what they have simply because they are searching for happiness in materialistic items instead of seeing the true blessings which surround them daily.

I have been richly blessed. I have a truly loving family, a home to live in which always requires some maintenance or another, good on my table and clothes on my back. I wouldn’t say I couldn’t use a little more of this or that, but we have what we need. Truly, in the darkest times, God always provides for us.

Recently, hubs and I went to a Cardinals game and as we were headed home, a panhandler was approaching cars. One look at her and you could see that something was not right with her. Hubs and I talked about her misfortune. How sad for her because she was someone’s child, possibly sister or mother. Now she was there in the streets begging for money. I prayed for her. She did not approach our car, as the light turned, but my heart ached for her. 

Most of the time in our city, we are panhandlers in the same spot. They get in and out of a van and scam people on the same street corners, but my heart told me this was different. U felt that the best thing I could do for her though, was pray. Other cars had given her something. I pray she got some good and didn’t drink it or buy drugs with the money she got. 

The old saying goes, everyone has something. My thought is that this is more true than one realizes. Over the summer, when in was so sick, there were several times in was afraid I would die because I didn’t feel like I was getting any better. I can’t imagine having something worse, but there are many loving with much worse. So today, I choose to cherish my life and make the most of my days, each day. Life is so short and only God knows when he will call us home. I’m a very different person now than I was last year at this time.

Now, go out and make the most of today. Don’t let a day go by without seeing or talking to those you love. Let them know they have impacted your life. They may not know it. Don’t let another day go by without doing that one thing that you’ve been putting off forever. Take the trip, eat the cake, but if nothing else, tell them you love them and don’t end on a sour note.

Where Did the Summer Go?

Each year as August rolls around, I ask myself this question. It always seems that once we celebrate the Fourth of July in all its glory, the summer flies by. This year is no exception as time marches forward in spite of our wish for it to slow down ever so slightly. 

In just a couple short weeks the college kids will be heading off to school, my second daughter among those headed away for the first time. Just after that, school starts anew for the rest of them and summer 2016 will be one more in the memory books. 

I have to say that for my kids, my husband, and myself, this has not been a great summer. Most of June I spent in and out of the hospital and the month of July was spent still recouperating from my surgery and complications. We didn’t do anything fun or exciting. We didn’t go anywhere or explore any new fun adventures. We stayed home. We bonded, at times, a little too much, but usually just The right amount! The best part was that most of us were together and grew out family bond. That is worth it’s weight in gold, however. 

If it weren’t for my family, I certainly don’t know how I could have managed. My dad, God bless him, even made me an Apple pie, from scratch! I taught him how to make it several months ago and he’s perfected it now. My beloved aunts have sent notes, recipes and even a piece of apple pie back with my dad, just for me. My cousins and one of my aunts came to visit me. I truly am blessed to have such a loving, caring and wonderful family near and far. It’s their love, actions and prayers that have helped me recover from this wretched surgery and infection. 

This is not to say my friends haven’t been there because they have been. But this is to remind us all just how important family is. The apple pie from my aunt was made by my 93 year old aunt. She lives 90 miles away and sent it home with my brother and my 85 year old dad. Family and love conquers all of given a chance. Respecting the elders in my family and caring for them means that even though my mom may no longer be with us, my family picks up the pieces and holds me in their hearts to care for me like she would have when I need her most. This summer I needed her like I’ve never needed her before. Having my aunts call and write to me has meant more than they will ever know. Their love has carried me through when I was missing my mom the most.

I’m doing much better and I have no doubt that I’m the next few weeks I’ll be fully recovered, but I’m still weak and I still have pain. I’ll get there though. Now most days are good days. Now, it’s time to put this summer and this chapter behind me and look forward to brighter days. I will never forget those who have been so kind to me throughout this summer though. It is through God’s grace, family and friend’s care and support that I am recovering and doing so well. It has been a journey I hope never to revisit. My mother always said when you have your health, you have it all. She was so right. 

Now it is time to look forward to one daughter pursuing her dream to become a nurse, one daughter going aeaybfir the first time to study pre-med and sociology then my youngest kids will be starting the school year at home. Number 3, my amazing artist and hilarious child will begin driving this fall, Lord help us! The youngest child, my beard devil, will be in 4th grade already. As we all day as adults, “just where did the time go”? Wasn’t my 20 year old just in preschool last year? 

Time is a strange thing. Not only does it stop for no one, but it also will heal wounds. Just look at me! I’m much better than I was 2 months ago. I bet you thought I was going to say it heals wounds of the heart. That’s a subject for another day. For now, I will look forward to what is left of this summer and the beginning of a brand new school year with brand new adventures to be had. There’s still a little bit of summer left for me to enjoy!

There’s a Storm Brewing

Have you ever felt like your mind is a storm brewing? I have. Not for any particular reason either. Sometimes, my mind just feels like a stupendous storm cloud building up energy, ready to release a downpour of torrential emotions instead of rain, for no reason other than not feeling myself, I suppose. Perhaps I’m just having one it “those” days. Usually I’m not feeling well or getting sick and simply don’t know it yet. Regardless, those storms of emotions play havoc in my life.

I’m sure I’m not the only one that has emotional storms that brew. If they do come to surface, I inevitably will erupt thunderously with a fury. It isn’t pretty, but what storm that knocks trees down is really considered attractive? I will immediately end up with a downpour of years for several reasons. First, it’s a release of pent up emotion that has been brewing inside, unable to find the proper outlet. Second, I’m ultimately so sorry for anyone that has been caught in my storm’s path. Unfortunately, it’s usually my ever faithful and always trusted husband. I always apologize to him because it is not fair. Luckily for me, however, he is the most forgiving and humble man. He always says it’s his fault even though he hasn’t done anything to deserve my storm. He just happened to be in it’s path. 

I have gotten better over the last year. I’ve learned to understand and recognize that sometimes this will happen and I have to accept my great flaw. I have to see that this is part of my depression and luckily doesn’t happen very often. I’m the work in progress and nothing worth having comes easy. Well, this journey is not easy, but I thank God that I have my husband by my side to get me through and to understand and put up with my storms. Lucky for me that he sees the sunny days that are so worth those storms.

Home Again, Home Again, Jiggety Jig!

Alas, my own bed, my own towels, my own pillows. No IVs, no uncomfortable bed or chairs. But, no more room service, no more call-if-you-need-anything.

Still, I am Home again, Home again, Jiggety jig!

There truly is no place quite exactly as comforting as home. Last night, I slept soundly because I knew that my Hubs was by my side, I knew where everyone who lives in my home was and they were all safe and secure.

So now I’ve had my major abdominal surgery but discovered that I had an area of infection inside me that needed to be drained. That was hospitalization 2 which was Sunday through yesterday. 

I now am home with my things of comfort right at me. There is something better than those things though. I have my family here. My husband has been amazing throughout all of this. Anyone who knows him would probably say that they wouldn’t expect anything less from him though. He even went to the pharmacy at 11 PM last night to pick up the medicine for the thrush I now have, thanks to those killer-strong antibiotics! What an amazing man.

My 2 daughters and my son have been at the ready just like my Hubs. They even brought me a small got fudge sundae last night which was so soothing on my side throat. The girls even decided to clean their room. Duh-duh-Dunn… And it’s looking almost inhabitable
again. 

So, as happy as I am to have hospitals around, I sure don’t want to visit another one for a very long time. I want to say a huge thank you too all of the nurses and techs who gave me excellent care, to the fantastic doctors who have me time and the the meds and tests needed to heal, and to the auxiliary staff for all you do each and everyday. Thank you so very much. You are what teamwork should be. You are the faces of the success of your hospital.

Kill ’em with Kindness

Have you ever felt awful because of what someone said very nonchalantly? I had that experience yesterday while getting my pedicure. It was a special treat given to me by my dearest friend, T. She picked me up and sped me off for some much needed girl time.

We seemed to wait forever soaking our tootsies in the lovely warm, bubbly water, waiting ever so patiently for someone to start our tropical pedicures. Finally, one of the girls came over, motioned for me to take my right foot out of the water. She took my polish off, did the same with the left foot. But while she did the left foot, quite nonchalantly, she stated, “you did your own polish.” I nodded and said yes. I’m not that frivolous as to spend $33 to have someone polish my toes all the time. It’s a treat! She further went on, “I know. I can tell. You got it all over your cuticles.”

It wasn’t necessarily what she said, but how she said it. It was demeaning. And she only stayed at my foot, yes foot, for a minute more before another client, her client I assume, came and sat down beside me. I was waiting again.

I could have complained about her attitude or her lack of attention for sure. T and I had been waiting there soaking our feet for ages by this time, but I said nothing. Eventually, another lady and a young man came and have the two of us the loveliest tropical pedicures.

What’s my point? Well, my point is simple. What good would have come from raising a fit? Perhaps her client had called for an appointment. We were walking and they were busy. The new lady was as sweet as pie. T and I walked out with beautiful toes and we each got white flowers painted on our big toes to boot! I even tried something I’ve never tried! I have baby blue nails! And they’re really cute! I love them!

Killing people with kindness always works much better than anything else, I find. Let’s all be kind to each other!

Struggles Surround Us

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Everyone has something they struggle with be it large or small. For me, I have many small things which amount to very little in the grand scheme of things and a few larger issues that do matter more.  The point is that when you look around, there isn’t a single person that isn’t struggling with something in their life at this very minute.

When we go to the store, we may have great service or we may have very poor service. My advice to you is to see things the way I do if you get the very poor service. Let’s say you are met by a cashier with a sour expression who speaks no more than absolutely necessary.

Most of you will be very put off by her/his behaviour. In my mind, I imagine what might have brought that cashier to have such a sour demeanor. Perhaps, his/her mother died recently. Perhaps her father was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Whatever I imagine, it explains their demeanor and causes me to consider how I might bring a smile to their face and brighten up there day.

The power of touch and a smile cans help any person feel much better overall and like their job is actually meaningful. Isn’t that what we all want in our life? To have fewer struggles and feel more meaningful. If we view people in a positive light, they will emit positivity and begin to think and feel better. No one knows the struggles another person is going through, but if we stay positive and complain less, the struggles will lessen.

Coffee Time and Time to Share

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If we were having our coffee this weekend, you would have to come visit my home. I’m one week post-op after my very big surgery! If you would rather have tea, I have many varieties but my coffee Thomas coffee. Its the best!

We would catch up about our week. My week was spent partially in the hospital after my big surgery. I got home on Tuesday and have continued my recovery at home in my comfy bed. My family have been my nursing staff and have done a fairly good job. I’m proud of them.

My belly looks like train tracks from the surgery but it it healing well. My arms are both sporting all colors of the rainbow since I had IV problems. One of my IV’s infiltrated which means that the fluids meant to go into the being were going into the tissues around the IV site. I have a painful lump there which could have been much worse but I have been nursing it with warm compresses to get the fluid reabsorbed. It looks much better and feels better too.

So, now you know where I’ve been and why my posts have been so few and far between. I love to write more than anything but when you are on medication that alters your awareness and makes you so sleepy it’s very difficult to put word together into cohesive sentences much less write paragraphs!

I hope you have had An amazing week. I can’t wait to hear all about it! I’m sure next week will have me back to more of my old self again. I sure hope so, anyway. Until then, I’ll have a cup of Thomas coffee with creme brulee creamer and a blueberry muffin to get me by. What about you?  

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Tales Post-Op: Home at Last

I can’t tell you how glad I am to be home.  I did absolutely enjoy being pampered by the extraordinarily kind nurses at the hospital for 5 days, but there really is no place like home.  I love my soft, clean, fresh sheets.  I do, however, miss the bed that raises up and down.  The pain caused from that movement can be described as less than favorable at the moment.  If you don’t know, I had a large abdominal surgery last Friday so my tummy muscles are crying right now with activities I normally do without blinking. In this edition of Deirdre’s Daily Dose, I hope to amuse you with some antics of the “far away, far out” me induced by pain medication and other journeys over the last 5 days.  I wish it won’t bother you in any way, and that you can follow it, because, well, I’m stoned on Norco and tramadol at the moment and keeping my eyes open is hard enough!
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First of all, everything takes 1o times longer to accomplish thanks to my pain medication. For instance, just this minute, I started typing, zoned out, I think I may have even fallen asleep, and all I keep hearing in my head is an earlier conversation about naming a future dog Edgar.  So, in that “away” time from blogging, my finger fit the “d” and stayed there for many rows of, yes, you guessed it, “d’s”.  Grrrrr! I had to erase all of them.  What a pain! I keep falling asleep during this paragraph and dreaming.  Just little short dreams about the strangest things.  If I could just stay awake to write.  This would be such a funny post, I tell myself.

In regards to sleeping and the medications, let me tell you a couple of things.  First, the dreams are so weird.  Very colorful, but I always dream in color, these dreams are in strange, off the wall colors most of the time.  I can fall asleep in seconds and often do.  So, I may be talking to you, then the eyes close, I’ll still be talking to you but the dreaming starts while I’m talking to you.  I’m in two different places at the same time.  How bizarre!  My eyes are so happy when they are closed right now.  I know my body has lots of healing to do, but I simply can’t keep my eyes open for very long.  It’s not even that I’m not interested in what you’re saying.  I’m very interested, but my eyes and my body are so tired. And reading, well just forget it.  If it’s very short, I may get through it.  I may have to have someone read to me. What normally would take me a few minutes could literally take me all day.  Writing this is taking far more time than it ever would if I weren’t under the influence of medications.  And, this is what I love more than anything else.  Sharing my time with you.  Sharing my thoughts with you.

I do look and feel like a pin cushion presently.  I have gone through my surgery which was done laprascopically. Because of this, I don’t have one giant incision.  I am fortunate to have 2 poke holes, one small incision and a larger incision which is still relatively small.  but still, I’m marked for life, again.  Dad said, regarding my abdominal surgeries that I should have a zipper placed in my abdomen.  I teased him and said, “well I have one already.  Haven’t you seen it?  It’s all the rage in the frequently operated abdomens this summer?” This was my eighth abdominal surgery in the last 20 years.  Man, I’m one tough nut to crack.  Soon, they will run out of things to take out.  I’m like the patient in the game “Operation”.

As far as my IV’s and needle pokes, well, my veins have decided that they’d like a rest.  I was stabbed 12 times in 5 days for my IV’s thanks to my veins deciding to be sissies.  They just didn’t want to play nice with the needles. You see, as a nurse, I know how long the IV’s should last, and mine usually only last 24 hours.  I did have the last one for 48 hours before it infiltrated, but there were a few days I needed 2 IV’s as well.  That was not fun.  They should last 72 hours.  Next time, I’m suggesting a central line.  That’s it.  My arms are various shades of black, blue, purple, yellow and green from the various bruising.  Fun times.  Oh Yeah!

Now, let us talk about fluid.  surgeons love to make sure you are overfilled with fluids.  I am no exception.  That wasn’t a problem with a catheter to take care of the urine I was producing, but Day 2, my friend, the cath, went bye bye. Up and down, up and down. Painfully I made that trek while the fluids ran in liter after liter through my veins.  I even started getting puffy little feet and hands.  I was looking like a puffy little marshmallow with those excessive fluids.  Love me them lactacted ringers! Eventually, they were turned off and my puffiness started to decline and is still declining.  I still weigh more than I did entering into my surgery though.  That I’m not a big fan of, but it will go.  Eventually.

I’m now up and about more that I was, when I’m not falling asleep at a moment’s notice. I’m starting to feel better, but I’m reminded with pain when it’s time to take my little friends, tramadol and norco.  I’ve got a regiment going on and hope it will be just a short term one.  I hate the feeling of loopiness in my brain.  My kids laugh at the way I speak after the norco.  I just want to sleep  Ah, there’s the twinge again.  Time for my date with T and N.  I’ll be off for now.  Wouldn’t want to fall asleep on you again and have another odd dream to attempt to tell you about!

Ta-Ta for now!

Deleriously Dreaming Deirdre! xo

As I Lay in my Hospital Bed

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My fabulous babies!

Good evening! Salutations to you all! I am starting to feel a little better from surgery last Friday, but I know I have a very long way to go. There is so much work in the department of my health. Of course that can be a very daunting expectation to dwell on, especially if you are in my current state of altered consciousness! Pain medication is my friend!

I worry about going home tomorrow because there are always things to do! There are meals to plan for as well as pleasing everyone. Well, I have help and my help says as do i, like it or lump it! That will be my new mantra I’ve decided. I’m not catering to the masses after this surgery.

I love my family with all my heart. I’m so proud of the fact my oldest came home tonight to care for me me. She washed my face, hair and my back. She went into nurse mode. I’m so proud of her. My second daughter came up earlier and took care of me too with the baby girl of our house. I’m a happy mama knowing that I must be doing something right.