When Words Get in the Way

I am such an emotional person. I’ve wished a thousand times to be the cool, emotionless woman who keeps it all together and never cries. It would certainly help when in an emotional crisis and trying to get the right words to come out of my mouth. You know that feeling. That one when you know what you want to say but your emotions get the best of you and the words come out jumbled at best. What you wanted to say and what comes out are completely unrelated to each other.

Have yoenu ever known precisely what you were going to say because you had practiced the exchange in your head? But no matter how many times you practice, how many scenarios you think of, being in the moment is so utterly different.

I become a flustered mess whose emotions get the best of me every time. I either ending in tears of anger or sadness or frustration. Regardless, I’m the emotional mess who had great points 5 minutes earlier but now can’t speak because I’m so ridiculously emotional. 

It isn’t fair because no one takes me seriously either. Who would take a blubbering fool seriously? Would you, in all honesty? Probably not unless they were injured seriously. We aren’t crazy. We are passionate. We deserve to be heard and heeded. Our minds are full of compassion. This is why we feel so passionately about certan things. Enough to fight them! 

    We are honorable. If we say we will do something, it will be done. If I love something or someone enough to fight for them, I will fight till my last breath. The words get in the way, but I will always keep trying to use them!

    Still in Hospital

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    Yes, I know you feel neglected. I know that feeling all too well..I promise I’ll be back to drive you mad soon enough. For now, you will just have to look at some old posts.

    Please don’t forget me though! I’m just a short time from returning. I just had to fight off a bit of an awful infection first. I’ve a drain in which is terribly terrible but I’ve named him Pablo, to keep my spirits up. I’ll have him about 2 -3 weeks. The site, where my stomach surgery had been 2 weeks before was feeling okay but not like it should, before Pablo.  Now, I’m starting to feel better. At last.

    Before Pablo, I was having daily fevers. They weren’t very high fevers, but to this well-seasoned nurse, it was a certain sign that something was amiss and it was most certainly, an infection.

    Thank God, for such wonderful inventions and all that we have! I had a CT scan and just like that the infection was found. Now, the not so jolly part. The healing…
    It just takes time but it is hard to write while mending. I will be back! Try to keep me back! Until then, my love to you my sweet followers, and to new friends.

    Still in Hospital

    image

    Yes, I know you feel neglected. I know that feeling all too well..I promise I’ll be back to drive you mad soon enough. For now, you will just have to look at some old posts.

    Please don’t forget me though! I’m just a short time from returning. I just had to fight off a bit of an awful infection first. I’ve a drain in which is terribly terrible but I’ve named him Pablo, to keep my spirits up. I’ll have him about 2 -3 weeks. The site, where my stomach surgery had been 2 weeks before was feeling okay but not like it should, before Pablo.  Now, I’m starting to feel better. At last.

    Before Pablo, I was having daily fevers. They weren’t very high fevers, but to this well-seasoned nurse, it was a certain sign that something was amiss and it was most certainly, an infection.

    Thank God, for such wonderful inventions and all that we have! I had a CT scan and just like that the infection was found. Now, the not so jolly part. The healing…
    It just takes time but it is hard to write while mending. I will be back! Try to keep me back! Until then, my love to you my sweet followers, and to new friends.

    Thank you!

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    I am so grateful to all of you. I had my most successful day so far blogging with 117 views! Wow! I’m at a loss for words. Usually I have 40 to 60 views. My highest number previously was 95! Thank you for your continued support in my endeavor to share my heart with the world. You made this happen. Bless you for making me so happy and making Deirdre’s Daily Dose a success!

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    I Write Because…

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    Empty pages ready to be filled!

    I love to write.  I just can’t help myself.  I find myself at the keyboard wondering “what shall I write about” and Boom! there it is.  I just find something that I want to write about or I find a daily prompt and once started, I have to finish.  Sometimes it’s poetry, sometimes it’s one of my family’s musings or perhaps just something that I find interesting.  Whatever the case may be, I have to write.

    Writing to me is an outlet.  It’s a form of communication that I’ve been using ever since I learned how to spell.  Spelling was always my best subject in grade school and now, well, I’m still writing.  I used to get in trouble when I was little.  I would go off crying to my room and I would inevitably look for my Winnie the Pooh to wipe my tears after a good cry.  I’d tell him how I’d been wronged and after we had a good chat I would see the error of my ways and always, always write an apology letter to my mom.  It would read something like this “Dear Mommy, I’m so sorry for making you mad.  I promise not to do it again.  Please forgive me.  Love, Deirdre”.

    I’ve written many letters over the years.  I’ve still got letters from my husband from when we dated in high school and college, but he doesn’t have my love letters.  I just love the written word.  It’s so powerful.  My mother always told me to be careful what you write.  Be sure that you don’t hurt anyone with your words because once it’s on paper, you can’t take it back.  Very good advice I’ve always lived by.

    I write to tell stories.  Our stories become our histories.  It’s how our generation will be remembered by the next ones.  I always wanted my mother to write her stories down, but she didn’t.  Now, I have to remember them because she was called home by God last November.  She didn’t have the chance to write them down.  That was what she had planned to do this year.

    I write to express my feelings.  When we feel joy, what better way to express that than to write. The same goes for sadness, anger, in the right context without hurting anyone. I usually write poetry to express my feelings.  I used to write poetry all the time then I sort of got away from it.  I’m writing it daily now and I’m feeling empowered and refreshed just in the act of writing it.

    I write for the sheer joy of writing.  Writing to me is not a chore.  Writing to me is like breathing.  I just hope that some people enjoy reading it as much as I enjoy sharing my ideas with the world.  My daughter, Katie, asked if I was trying to become internet famous.  I told her no, but wouldn’t that be wild if that did somehow happen?  I don’t think I write that well, but I do enjoy seeing that there are people reading my posts and enjoying them.  I want to share my love of writing with the world.  I especially enjoy seeing where everyone is from and reading everyone else’s posts.

    These are a few of the reasons I write.  How about you?  What are your reasons for writing?  What do you enjoy about my writing?  Please share any comments with me.  I love that connection with everyone.

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    This is written as part of a link up to Finish the Sentence Friday. This week’s sentence was ‘I write because…’. Head on over and view the rest! They’re always a blast to read! http://www.FindingNinee.com